Monday, July 20, 2009

Psycho Cycle

A bunch of cyclists friends decided on a trip up to Phnom Thamao zoo last weekend. I went via car cause of my near death experience with the flu or whatever it was that had me shaking and burning up in bed scorching the sheets. I just wasn't ready to bike the 80 something odd kilometers round trip. So I decided Seth would pedal my cycle towards the zoo along with the rest of the gang.

The departure time was set at 7 a.m. for the bikers to beat the heat and animals littering the roadway. After waking the Donkey and Picking up Sophy we were off.... sort of. Making a stop at The Shop on 240 for a drink and some sandwiches to go. We ended up heading out of town later in the car around 8 or so. I was expecting to see a line of bicycles and a couple tuk-tuks escorting the motley crew. Instead we ended beating them on the way up. It turns out they had an adventure of their own.


I had only came to Phnom Thamao once before. I didn't drive during that occasion so I was jogging my memory as to where the turn-off might be. No big deal since there was a big faded sign with distorted animal paintings right before the road that leads there. According to the sign I could see Godzilla and T-Rex go at it as well as some break-dancing penguins. Bitching.

So on this road is something I've never seen before. It's a few kilometers long. Sprinkled along the entirety are beggars old and young all the way to the actual zoo entrance. People just sitting with makeshift umbrellas of fallen palm fronds to shade from the sun. Their skin dyed and wrinkled by the heat of the tropical sun with black eyes peering up from under filthy kromas. Their folded hands permanently locked in the prayer position. Buckets of water with half submerged pails floating atop. Why? As cars drive by they kick up dust. So the people would toss out a pail of water just before it approaches so the dust is minimized. It actually turns out that that's the method of the beg. It's an attempt at keeping cars free of dust. A futile exercise but nonetheless a service on the part of the beggar showing some effort that may free up some riels. Interesting. Jeff made someone's day by giving them a 10 thousand riel note. The equivalent of 2.50 U.S. The guy smiled a mouthful of tooth decay back at him and we went along our way.


A couple hours or so passed as we meandered about the zoo both by car and foot. There was plenty of animals to be seen in cages and roaming free. I didn't realize but man! There are some ugly birds out there. I mean hideous. Funny shaped creatures with beaks that could swallow small children. Bald protruding bone white skulls that sprout random hairs. Eyes that followed you. Eyes connected to a brain that you could see thinking. Freaky. An all time favorite has to be the monkeys. Especially the crazy Howler monkeys. Now correct me if I'm wrong but that's what I'm gonna call them for now in lieu of their real name. These guys are insane. They must be bipolar I shit you not. They're 2 to a cage. For what reason I'm not sure. The pair we saw gave new definition to the saying a barrel of monkeys. This guy would sit zen like meditating and then all of a sudden it happens. A guttural hu-hu-hu followed by a trip to a blue water barrel (meant for sleeping?) where he would stick his head inside. The noise would continue and build up in volume. It's like the 1812 overture during the cannon climax. As soon as the hu-hu-hu couldn't get any loader he would explode from the water container and swing around the cage damn near breaking it and start going ape-shit all around the cage grabbing stuff and shaking it violently for a good 15 seconds. It was awesome.

After finding our way to the off site picnic area we were greeted by vendors waving us in to come eat at their platform stalls. After a few meters we spotted Seth that didn't look too worse for wear. He took a dive after hitting a patch of gravel right outside the zoo entrance. A smear of blood trailed down his left leg nearly dyeing his sock. His ring finger swollen north of the ring with no way to remove it short of cutting it off. The shirt he was wearing had tell tale signs of a roll in the dirt and the dirt won. Seeing people strewn out on benches grenade-explosion style made me realize that the car was a blessing. People were recuperating and fueling up for the ride back to the Penh. Maybe next time I'll join them. For now I'll just use gasoline to get around outside of town. Safe riding.















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